Who knows what it is about a pregnancy that seems to give some people license to be
inconsiderate and impolite, but strangers and even well meaning acquaintances will touch
and probe areas that should be off-limits.
Columnist Peggy Post, great granddaughter-in-law of Emily Post, has encountered and
resolved many of these social blunders. Your Baby Today asked Post, who's working on a
parenting book (an addition to her stock of general, business, entertaining, and wedding
etiquette books) and is a regular contributor to Good Housekeeping and Parents magazines,
for points of protocol regarding expecting mothers and those around her.
A crowded bus or train
"For sitting strangers, it is thoughtful, though not mandatory, to offer and give a
pregnant woman your seat," says Post. For pregnant women, if no one offers, simply
ask someone if he or she would mind giving up a seat.
To ask or not to ask
"Don't be too nosy," Post advises, who recommends avoiding questions about the
baby's gender and conception. "It's really important not to get too personal. Take
the lead from the expectant mother." In other words, discuss the topics she
addresses. If in doubt, don't ask. And questions like, "Is it a planned
pregnancy?" and "When are you due?" should never be uttered because you
never know if a woman is truly pregnant or, perhaps, has already delivered her baby.
To touch or not to touch
For expecting mothers, field rude questions or the hands-on approach with patience and
humor. Post suggests saying "The sleeping baby doesn't want to be touched,"
"I've been poked or prodded enough," or "I don't like my stomach touched,
I'm sure you understand." Be considerate: Don't touch a pregnant woman's stomach or
other body parts unless given permission.
A miscarriage
For friends and co-workers, treat it like a death. Don't disregard it, offer advice, or
say something as insensitive as, "I'm sure you'll have another." Instead, simply
say: "I'm thinking of you. I'm sorry to hear about your loss."
|
*Work-at-home ideas
